Sign ratings
You hang them, I rank them. I have a degree in signology.
- Sign location: Men’s bathroom, Universal Joint. Purpose: Educating me about the contributions Meat Loaf has made to music. Ranking: F. Comments: This sign fails to educate me. I knew as much about Meatloaf after reading it as I did before I read it.
- Sign location: Near Agnes Scott College. Purpose: Insulting the disabled. Ranking: A. Comments: This is an effective rebuke of the wheelchair bound. (You can use the crosswalk.)
- Sign location: Java Monkey. Purpose: Saving the Muffin Man. Ranking: C+ Comments: Do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man, do you know the muffin man, don’t stick him in this thing.
- Sign location: Dash of my car. Purpose: Using magic to protect me from traffic accidents. Ranking: B- Comments: While the St. Frances card has kept me accident free this year *knock on wood,* I wish the Catholic Church had a better explanation for its Saint choices. How can St. Frances be a patron saint of something that didn’t even exist when she was alive? St. Frances should be the Patron Saint of Time Travel.